Things I’m trying to master at 25.

  1. Having Flaws.
    Our society demands very high expectations of people, in response we hide our real selves by directing attention to the things that make us look good. We approach life like our Facebook page, only letting the best photos and comments through so we are viewed in the best possible light. I have two theories about Facebook: 1. It makes us feel really good to look at our page because it is all the best things about us. 2. It makes us feel bad because all we see are the best things about everyone else. With friend lists soaring over 500 people, there is always someone on a better vacation, with more exciting news, better jokes and posting prettier pictures. Facebook is no longer sincere, and I fear our culture is headed that way too. Imperfections = sincerity.
  2. Balancing work with rest.
    I read an article once that dug deep into the mind of young females that work in communications but get burnt out by 30 {read it}. There was a quote that stood out to me – “These women worked like crazy in school, and in college, and then they get into the workforce and they are exhausted.” Sometimes I feel like young people work too much, but it’s also putting in our dues. You have to work hard to stand out above the other hundreds of grads in your field, especially living in a college town. That’s the country we live in – freedom to work as hard as we want. My top strength via the Gallup Strength Finder was Achievement. I like to be able pull off the impossible. I love feeling ownership. True effort and passion means exhaustion. This week is the epitome of work over rest. I need to remember to take a break… in a couple weeks. Maybe.
  3. Accepting help.
    “You want to do this alone, don’t you?’ My dad asked me as he gave me a check in a rather large sum. “We want you to be able to put this behind you so you can move on.” My parents have savings for each of their kids, probably for weddings, but in my case, bailing me out. I didn’t take everything, in fact I asked them to wait to give me the second half of what they offered. All I could feel was shame and failure. Failure to be prepared. Failure for my mistakes. Failure for getting into such big messes. As expected, I cut as many costly corners as I could and ended up not accepting the second half.
  4. Allowing friends to love me.
    I have a lot of insecurities with trusting females, as so many of them have turned on me throughout my life. This being the case, so much of my past has revolved around finding “the one” person to love me, as media has told me to do. Finally, I’ve found several friends that truly care about me. I can trust them with the same quality of honesty, respect, and sincerity as I have with men I have loved. Honestly, maybe even a little more.
  5. Admitting I’m not rich.
    Yes, I have a big-girl job and a house, but own a beater car most 16-year-olds would be embarrassed of. I occasionally buy designer clothes (and by designer I mean they have their own store at the mall), but still wear things I bought in high school. I have credit card bills that are boarder-line out of control, eat Raman noodles, and don’t have cable. But, I it forces me to set goals to get my physical surroundings the way I’d like them to be. I think so many people in my generation are leery of owning things. We like to barrow and give back. We don’t like to take care of our cars, clothes, or apartments (I can probably count on one hand the number of times I actually cleaned a shower in college). Does owning vs. “barrowing” pay off? I’m not sure, but it fulfills my need for accomplishment and ownership.
  6. Learning to say ‘no’.
    Life has so many pleasures, but being an adult means I need to know when to draw the line. No – I can’t go to the bars, I’m broke (see #5). No – I’d love to go, but I haven’t spent more than three waking hours at home and my house is a mess. No – I love Raising Cane’s, but between the latte and Brugger’s Bagels I’ve already eaten too many calories today.
  7. Confessing there some things I will always be bad at.
    Driving, remembershing history, taking shots, public speaking, knowing where I’m going before I leave, returning library books on time. How do I learn to compensate for them?
  8. Being Tall.
    It makes me uncomfortable when short guys give me compliments on my height. Listening is okay. Accepting them is best.
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Author: Clarissa A.

The older I get, the less I know.

1 thought on “Things I’m trying to master at 25.”

  1. I really like the honesty of this post. Number six has always been difficult for me. Prior to leaving my home town area and a business I had worked super hard to open (ahem…number two) I found myself in a place where I needed to learn to say “no” to almost everything because I was so burnt out on having said yet to so much. I feel like it’s taken me a few years and a new job where I often told my boss “no” because I was already doing the work of three people, to move on from that overwhelmed place. Now that I’m in the process of finding work again and living off of and accepting the help of others (also very hard) I’m starting to feel like I can say “yes” again….I just need to remember that I don’t have to say “yes” to everything.

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